Rigaberto Religetti ,
who is: the author of the channeled gospel of
the book of robotic mind,
which is: the text about which this column purports to offer insight.
Rigaberto Religetti is one of the seminal icons of pantheonic lore. There are few, if any, who don't have some opinion about this historical giant, and yet, despite what is now at least 3 generations of vigorous discussion of the prophet's life and teachings, there remains little consensus, even amongst Precreatorial clergy.
In fact, there is vastly more agreement about Religetti with the Alienatorial church, and within that of Entropotripocles - the church of squalor - than there is amongst Rigaberto's proponents. The Archbishop of the church of Alienator, a notoriously sneering scholar, but one whose skills and intelligence must be acknowledged, famously once said of Religetti,
"that so-called prophet was just a dirty, stupid, buffoon. He was totally unfit even to clean the bathroom at the Arby's near my house. That Precreator might call him "prophet" is either a stunningly wrong myth, or it is indisputable proof that Precreator is naught but a sham-god --- a farcical, affront to divinity whose slovenly, malevolent sense of irony is the bane of all mankind. I pray that should I ever afford weight to even one word of that cretin Religetti's so-called 'prophecy,' Alienator will make swift reprisal: appear before me, reach all the way down through my mouth, take hold of the inner walls of my anus, and pull them forcefully back up through my body and out my mouth."
This is pretty much representative of the attitudes that Alienatorians hold towards all things precreatorial, and towards Religetti in particular. But then, Alienatorians are consistently the most certain of individuals, and the most prone to acerbicism, contempt, and dismissal. They are also consistently among the most intelligent of individuals, but, tellingly, they are not consistently the most closely aligned with truth.
Regardless, outside the harsh stone walkways of the Le Grand Cathedral de Alienation and (to a much lesser extent) the haphazard-aries of the Decentralized Worship Centers of The Church of Squalor (Centrally Located in San Antonio Texas) there is little consensus about the prophet's place in history.
It is in the interest of objectivity, then, that I provide here the following transription of the indisputable gospel of the pantheon. The text below is the first part of the story of Rigaberto Religetti. It is the gospel as provided by The Church of Curtis. As such, it is indisputeably true.
Curtis, the god of text and of naming things, has, of course, dominion over the histories of the gods. While all channeled gospel is afforded the status of Pantheonic Gospel, only gospel that comes from the Church of Curtis must be considered absolutely and literally true and factual. About this, every sect agrees. Naturally, Curtisarians have a responsibility to steer clear of political matters, and they, with the execption of the footnote dispute, (see the Curtisarian Gospel, genesis, nested asides, primary directory) have always met this responsibility.
Note: The length of the gospel below is not too substantial, but the history will be broken into three parts, to allow for the above introduction, and for equivalent commentary about parts 2 and 3.
I strongly recommend giving the following audio file a try, as it reads for you part one in its entirety, which, in addition to eliminating the need to read it, allows you to hear more of the history than is available to read below. Also, it assists the listener by providing certain other audio-tory elements that may prove beneficial to understanding, especially for those who have a natural inclination towards audio-tory input.
Listen here
or
Part One:
By the spring of 1894, Rigaberto Religetti's obsession with the robotic mind had devolved into something deeply unwell. His marriage had ended earlier that winter, when a last ditch effort by the unappealing man to save his unconsummated, but nonethelss legally binding, matrimony, had failed disastorously.
The young dutchess, who had been accidently married to Rigaberto by the drunken clergy of the Church of Squalor amidst an odd confluence of medical emergencies and mistaken identities, on the very day of her engagement to the courtly Montgomery Smythe, Earl of York, had planned a poetry reading. She hoped that it would distract her from the occasion of the second anniversery of that darkest day of her personal history - the day she became Religetti's bride.
The literary gathering, towards which all the finest ladies of society expressed intention to attend, served to mark the new year, and promised the premere of the readings of new verse by Percy Levandre, poet laureate of the dukedom of New Hamptingtonshire.
Rigaberto was definitely not invited. This sort of treatment from the dutches, his wife, was typical, but even so, Rigaberto's faith in his marriage never wavered. Now unlike his wife, from whom Rigaberto received naught but anger and frigidity, Religetti felt quite strongly that the pairing was a consequence of divine influence, that it ought to be saved, and that it most urgently needed consummation.
Contemporary scholars, while agreeing with our Pantheonic hero's assessment that divine hands had stirred his marital pot, uniformly hold that Entropotripocles, high lord of stumbles and confusion, and not Baby Lady Bay, Goddess of social activity, was the divine being responsible for said stirring.
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